Kokoda (+2.5 Money Trains)

In 1942 a crack unit of Japanese troops landed at Gona on the north coast of New Guinea with the aim of marching across the island and taking Port Moresby. This would give them a forward air base for an invasion of Australia, which would most likely have succeeded. But standing in the way was an outnumbered handful of Australian troops who fought along the Kokoda Track and finally stopped the Japanese advance, just 50km or so from Port Moresby. Not that this was considered good enough, mind you. The army commanders, particularly General Douglas "Let's nuke China" MacArthur, didn't understand what the terrain and conditions were like and were so disappointed with the fighting spirit of the Diggers that they demoted the officers and shipped them off to hardship postings as punishment. Here's an example of the fighting spirit considered so lacking:

Keith Norrish was shot four times in the chest and had three broken ribs. "The medic stuffed sulfamide tablets into the holes, wrapped it up and that was that." Any plans to give up and die? "I had no intention to. We had spirit. It never entered our heads that we would fail. Defeat was never an option."

And another:

Charles Metson had his leg shattered by a Japanese machine gun. He refused a stretcher: "It will take eight of you chaps to carry that thing. Throw it away. I'll get along somehow." So he crawled, dragging his leg, with his hands and knees wrapped in bandages to protect them from the stones that lay beneath the mud.

No spirit?

Anyway, this was the first time the Japanese had lost a land battle in WWII and, by stopping the invasion of Australia, was probably even more crucial to the outcome of the war in the Pacific than the Battle of Midway.

Now, with a story like that, you could film it with Star Wars figures in your backyard and still be up for the Palm d'Or at Cannes and a swag of Oscars.

So it's a pity that the creative minds behind Kokoda chose not to tell it. Instead, they tell the story of one particular mission by a bunch of Diggers. I don't know what stage of the whole Kokoda Track battle(s) this came at, as it just isn't clear. Anyway, these blokes go out, not too many return, and you just don't come to appreciate what kind of hell they really had to put up with. (Here's an idea: they wore khaki clothes and flat soled boots, the Japanese wore jungle green and jungle boots. Guess who had the upper hand.) You do get to see just how precipitous the mountains were they were fighting in, and you get an idea of the mud and the rain, but you don't really care. The characters have no depth, the actors (a "who's who" of Australian B-grade TV actors, or is that a "who's that"?) are wooden, and the plot of this one-act film is nearly non-existent.

The film reaks of being made by film school graduates who are generally so earnest that they shut their eyes when they talk, and they get so involved with their little story that they forget that the viewer isn't approaching the film from the same point as they are. But even if you do have some knowledge of the situation, the film adds nothing. I think they were trying to make another Galipoli, but instead they fell flat on their faces in the mud.

2 1/2 Money Trains: Better than Matrix Reloaded, not as good as Cliffhanger.

A quick word on the book I lifted the above quotes from: "More What If", edited by Robert Cowley. This is a collection of essays on what might have been, and the author on the chapter on Kokoda, James Bradley, while writing a great essay, is under the impression that Australia celebrates a national holiday, Kokoda Day, every August 29th. News to me...